16 Things You Should Master Before Leaving Texas

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Texas doesn’t make it easy to leave. You can drive eight hours north from Brownsville and still not make it out. And if you’ve ever entered the state from the east on I-10, you’ve seen that ungodly number that lets you know just how far you are from El Paso. That’s probably when you take one hand off the wheel and gesture “Whew!” Thank goodness you aren’t trying to escape out the other end.

If life does pull you out of the great state for one reason or another, there are some things you better get straight before you hit that state line:

1. Learn to two-step. You get extra points for spins.

2. Learn to make a mean margarita. Neon green mix is not invited to the party.

3. Learn to pick a guitar. Or, at least know someone who can.

16 Things You Should Master Before Leaving Texas

4. Learn to ride a horse. Cliché? Yes. Worth it? Absolutely.

5. Go to a high school football game. The crowd under the Friday night lights is electric.

6. Get some boots. Non-Texans expect that you’ll have them on hand for country concerts and costume parties.

7. Float the river at least once, so you’re an expert on the art. You know good and well that your ice chest needs its own tube.

8. Learn to make some sweet tea. Sit down for this: Some states don’t offer sweet tea in restaurants, nor do they know what it is. #sugarmakesitbetter

9. Learn to smoke a brisket. Your great-great grandfather’s recipe or YouTube instructions — just open that pit and smoke some meat.

10. Tamales. Yes, it’s a noun and not a verb, but it’s everything in a Texas December. Either make yourself a Christmas celebrity and make them from scratch or have the down-low on where to find them.

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