Lifestyle

Hold on Texas, ‘The Taco Cleanse’ is a Real Thing

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Tony Maples Photography

 

Move over Wine Wednesday, here comes Taco Tuesday…through Monday again. And repeat! No, we’re not kidding. Self-proclaimed “taco scientists” and clearly taco enthusiasts co-developed a book entitled “The Taco Cleanse.” Tacos are a Texas specialty of course (minus the “cleanse” part, depending on the amount of hot sauce you use) and a dieting trend that many of us can get behind. Think about that for a New Year’s resolution!

Hold on Texas, ‘The Taco Cleanse’ is a Real Thing

Photo: Facebook/The Taco Cleanse

Wes Allison, Stephanie Bogdanich, Molly R. Frisinger and Jessica Morris co-wrote “The Taco Cleanse” after consuming nothing but tacos for each meal of the day over a period of thirty days. Straight. As a result, they encourage others to follow their footsteps. While this plan does not promise loss of weight, some of the supposed benefits that are meant to be derived from the cleanse are:

  1. Enhanced fertility/birth control
  2. Wake up with new enthusiasm
  3. Sleep improvement
  4. Your life becomes more fun
Hold on Texas, ‘The Taco Cleanse’ is a Real Thing

Photo: Facebook/The Taco Cleanse

Although there are many a thing Texans can teach a person about the makings of a great taco, the authors of the book provide all the requirements for their taco-based lifestyle, such as tortilla recipes, more than thirty-five vegan recipes for taco fillings (wait, what?) and the types of toppings that best compliment them.

Hold on Texas, ‘The Taco Cleanse’ is a Real Thing

Photo: Wikimedia

Now, let’s be honest. Texas tacos are the gateway drug to an entire underworld of phenomenal Mexican food! Tamales, enchiladas, fajitas…Ay Dios mio! They’re handy, quick and easy to make and eat, and can be filled with any amount and conglomeration of meat, sauce, and vegetables imaginable. That being said, we’re not sure you’ll want to eat them morning, noon and night, but who knows? From Amarillo to San Antonio there are taco “specialists” that aim to please. You could do a Machacado con Heuvo a la Mexicana in the morning, an Al Pastor (pork or beef…remember you’re in Texas) at lunch, and a Baja Fish at supper. Think of the taco-bilities!!

Hold on Texas, ‘The Taco Cleanse’ is a Real Thing

Photo: Flickr/Djjewelz

An excerpt from the book states, “A taco consumed within three hours of waking, colloquially called a ‘breakfast taco,’ has been anecdotally proven to erase the ill effects of the previous night’s toxic indulgence. A midday taco frequently results in more positive physical effects. The spicy taco consumed prior to sleep stimulates the nocturnal imagination and has been used by taco spiritualists to induce prophetic dreams.” Hmmm. So if your version of sexting includes the words “bring tacos,” if your election platform consists of putting a taco truck on every corner, and if you can’t imagine a world without a crunchy, puffy, or frybread taco, it’s a safe bet you might be interested in what “The Taco Cleanse” has to say!